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Well, the holiday season is here. I know this because I cried while cooking. The rest of the year I can manage to whip up dinner in under a half hour (or perhaps pick up would be more accurate than whip up—as in “pick up a pizza”). But the two-day culinary marathon for Thanksgiving dinner for seven adults and seven children puts me closer to the edge than I care to admit. One temporary snag in this over-planned day brought me to tears. While the day was not without stress, I am certain it will qualify one of our most memorable and meaningful holidays as well. The work was small, relatively speaking, and was related, after all, to the abundance of my life, rather than any lack of resources. In fact, the task of preparing food and welcoming guests brings me joy. This Thanksgiving, that was especially true. For along with our turkey and stuffing, we enjoyed a full serving of perspective on just how blessed we are, provided by one of the families who gathered around our table (technically, two tables pushed together). My husband Scot and I value offering hospitality, not just to friends but to strangers. We often host international pastors and leaders, having them stay at our home while they attend conferences at our church. Our guest book is full of names of people from all around the world. But a few weeks ago, we felt God’s prompting to wade a little deeper into this discipline, and so we responded to a call for volunteers to invite a refugee family to Thanksgiving dinner. As a friend of mine pointed out when I told him about our plans, “it sounds like you’re trying to put the giving back into Thanksgiving.” Maybe. But it was God who did that giving, and our hearts that overflowed. We connected with this Muslim Somalian family through Exodus World Services (www.e-w-s.org), which connects refugee families brought to the U.S. by our government with a Christian church or family. Exodus partnered with our church, Willow Creek Community Church (www.willowcreek.org), to offer refugee families a chance to have a Thanksgiving meal and to meet some Americans. Scot and our neighbor Bob drove into the city to pick up the family, who has only been in the States for a month, after years of living in Kenya to escape the violence and persecution they faced in their native Somalia. (I’ve omitted their names for their privacy and protection). The husband and his teenage son were eager and friendly, and though their English was limited, we were able to communicate quite well—the teenager translating when needed, and plenty of gestures and pointing filling in the blanks. The day was warm, so Scot and the kids took them outside to try some American activities like basketball, football, and hitting plastic golf balls around the yard, something this teenager had never done. The wife, tall and elegant, draped in a black burca and head scarf, was shy, but you could see in her eyes that she’s no stranger to hardship. She sat on the couch, smiling and nodding, politely sampling the nuts, cheese and crackers spread on the coffee table, accepting my offer of orange juice. The one thing she could say in English was that she didn’t speak English, but her son was able to translate her infrequent comments. She played Jenga with my daughter and her niece, a smiling six-year-old who wore her black Muslim head scarf with a sweatshirt, jumper and blue jeans. She laughed with the children when the wooden blocks tumbled down, and smiled as she listened to her niece playing an improvised piano duet (mostly rhythmic pounding) with our neighbor’s daughter Olivia. The family came here from Kenya, where they have lived for several years, most likely in a refugee camp, having fled violence and persecution in their homeland of Somalia. They and their extended family have come to the United States where they hope to make their home. Conversation was limited and not easy. My husband, bless his heart, spent quite a bit of his day in the car, driving the family to and from their home. The turkey took longer to cook than expected, and we ran out of mashed potatoes too quickly. But in the end, those things, of course, were inconsequential. What mattered is that we listened to God’s prompting, and obeyed it. And that this family got to receive the love of God, in our welcome, in the meal, in the containers of leftovers we sent home with them. And our family got to experience God’s loving presence in a very real way as well. I felt it when I asked them to join in our custom of praying before the meal and the family joined with ours and our friends and held hands as we thanked God for our meal and for all those gathered in our home. I explained to the family (the son ably translating) that our Thanksgiving holiday tradition stems from a feast celebrated by people who came to our country to find freedom to live and worship God as they wanted to. They nodded, knowingly, like Pilgrims. One of our guests, Paul, had traveled years ago to Africa, and was able to talk with our guests about his experiences in their homeland. I also overheard him talking about our country, and how we try to practice what we call “tolerance”—accepting others even though we think or believe differently. I have heard some Christians say “tolerance” is just a euphemism for winking at sin, but it seems a more Christ-like approach than what is happening in Somalia, and other places, where people are killing each other for disagreeing. Sometimes the injustice and poverty and violence in the world feels overwhelming and you have to wonder—where is God in all this? The world is so dark and dangerous, and the problems are so huge, what can I do to make a difference? Well, it may seem like a small thing, but you can extend grace. Because grace is the opposite of injustice. If justice means the scales are balanced, and fair, then injustice means they are out of balance in the direction of evil. But grace means those scales of justice are unbalanced in the direction of good. Grace evens out injustice—it’s just as scandalous, really. In cases of both injustice and grace, people get what they don’t deserve. Injustice is undeserved suffering; grace is unearned merit. It’s easier to give grace if you are mindful of how much it has been extended to you. And that’s what I know: God’s grace has been more than sufficient in my life, and when I give grace, grace flows all the more. And where is God? God is where grace is given. To offer a meal without regard to theological differences, cultural differences—you don’t have to agree with someone on every little thing in order to be kind to them. I sensed God’s smile in the smiles of this Muslim family, in the gratitude they expressed. I sense the presence of the Holy throughout the afternoon. When the family got ready to leave, the father stood and looked at me. He touched his chest with both thumbs, his hands held perpendicular to his body, facing each other. "Your heart," he said, "is pure. Thank you." He spoke quickly to his son, who translated, “he will pray that God will bless you.” I told him, clasping both his hands, that I was honored to have him and his family in my home. His wife gave me a quick embrace and said in English, “Thank you.” When the little girl, clutching a teddy bear my daughter had given her, said goodbye, she took my hand and kissed it—I nearly cried again she was so sweet. But even if they hadn’t been able to communicate their appreciation, it would have been worth it. Because I knew Jesus was smiling, that he was there at our table, that as we welcomed strangers, we were indeed welcoming him. Until next time! Keri Wyatt Kent
Oxygen: Deep Breathing for the Soul
Oxygen: Deep Breathing for the Soul" This book makes that an easy vow to keep. Oxygen: Deep Breathing for the Soul is a devotional unlike any other. Unlike most traditional devotionals, Oxygen guides readers through meditation and reflection on just one Gospel passage each week. This
book, co-published by MOPS International (
www.mops.org) and Revell Books, will take you deeper into
Scripture while teaching you spiritual practices such as prayer,
meditative reading, journaling and solitude. Oxygen is a
tool that will help you deepen your understanding of Scripture and
help you connect with Jesus in a meaningful way.
Oxygen is also a
great resource for small groups. I’ve written a leader’s guide,
which will be available as a free download on
www.keriwyattkent.com, or on
www.mops.org once the book is released.
If thinking about my Thanksgiving adventure has you hankering for a more meaningful and simpler Christmas, I’d heartily recommend this book. Robinson and Staeheli give a bit of history on how Christmas evolved into such a materialistic frenzy, and point out that women are “the Christmas magicians” who coordinate all the crazy details. They also point out that we often feel conflicted, feeling both joyful and stressed.
I pull out this book every year
around the beginning of December to remind myself to think
through my priorities, to focus on what matters. It combines
insight into our culture with practical tips on simplicity that
will make your holiday season a lot saner. The authors urge you
to decide what really matters to you, and to scale back on
things that don’t.
Watch for the Light:
Readings for Advent and Christmas This is a great collection of readings from great contemplative writers ranging from Madeleine L’Engle to Henri Nouwen, from John Donne to Philip Yancey. It’s another title that I pull out each year. The readings are dated so you can read one per day from the last week of November through the first week of January. But you can dip into this book randomly (so you don’t feel guilty for falling behind in your reading). Each day’s reading is short but thought-provoking, and helps remind you of what really matters this time of year. All of these varied readings (some are essays, others poems) focus on the coming of Jesus, the mystery and miracle of the Incarnation, and serve as ballast against the pressure to buy, make, consume and over-decorate. As the days grow shorter and darker (and we get busier and more distracted) this book reminds us to look for Jesus, to wait for him, to remember the reason for the season. I heartily recommend this book. And don’t worry, it’s not too late to start reading it even though the first Sunday of Advent has already passed. You can purchase this book for $12.99 with F*REE shipping by using our special order form. If you want to learn more about the biblical practice of hospitality, and about refugees and how you can help them, here’s a resource that might be helpful on this month’s topic. (I found this on Exodus World Services’ website but I haven’t read it—but I’m planning to order it.) http://www.e-w-s.org/html/study_guide.html
“I was hungry and you fed me, … I'm telling the solemn truth: Whenever you did one of these things to someone overlooked or ignored, that was me—you did it to me.” ---Jesus, in Matthew 25: 35-40 (The Message)
I believe the holidays are about gratitude, hope and wonder. What are you grateful for? What are you hoping? What are you wondering about? At this time of year, many charities are asking for donations. Spend some time praying over any requests that come your way. Be attentive. What can you do this holiday season to give to those who may not be able to return the favor? What is Jesus prompting you to do? Where can you extend grace to balance out injustice? If you are longing to experience Jesus’ presence in a deeper way, why not invite Him to dinner sometime this holiday season? To learn how to connect with a refugee family, visit www.e-w-s.org. Women's Class to Read and Discuss
Listen: December 2006
Once again, check out Keri's column for Christianity Today’s site, at: http://www.christianitytoday.com/childrensministry/features/foryoursoul.html
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December 5, 2006
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